Example: A New Neighborhood (Combo PPs)

Two people move into the same neighborhood. They know each other, but haven’t spoken in years. So they don’t realize they have just moved near each other.

Neither of them have made such major changes recently, so they’re a little rusty at meeting new people. Their first impulse is to relate to people in ways they are used to, since it values what makes them special (honor integrity).

However, they soon discover people here are not like people where they moved from. They are going to need to relate to a wider variety of people than they’ve been used to. In doing so, they will need to allow some uncertainty in new relationships.

One of them decides to avoid forcing his “old style” on someone he meets in the park. He involves himself actively in some of what they are talking about. By doing so, he makes some smooth transitions in the conversation. They agree to swap email addresses so they can get in touch later (connect independently).

He soon finds discarding his old style so effective that when the two old friends (the ones who are new to the neighborhood), happen to meet one day, he has to slightly switch back to his old style for his friend to recognize him!

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